It's been about a month since things ended here with Dillhole. I personally have had no contact with him since the day he left here. Daddy and Sissy had a few texts from him that day and the next day, but nothing at all since then.
Funny things start happening when you stand up and tell your story though. Other people that have lived the same experiences as you start standing up and telling their story too. It may not be exactly the same, but similar enough that you can start to see a serial pattern of predatory behaviour.
That's not the point of this writing though. This writing is to let you all know about what's been going on in our house since our intense, drama filled, and short relationship with Dillhole.
I know that I've told you all my story with him, that he was able to play on emotions and insecurities, well I was not the only one he was able to do that with. Little One's story with Dillhole is hers to tell or not tell, so I wont get into too many details, but I will share that he took VERY vulnerable information that he had and used it against her, breaking any trust she had for him.
She had been making such amazing progress opening up to Daddy and I about some of her past issues, and we were helping her deal with them in a healthy, constructive way. Since having to deal with Dillhole, she has made quite a regression, and we're discovering that it's a much bigger set back than we originally thought.
I know with time that we will all manage to get her back to the place she was, and she'll make amazing progress beyond that. This is just a detour on our journey together, not a roadblock. Little One knows how much she is loved and cared for here and knows that we're always here for her no matter what.
How do you tell the person you love more than anything in the world that you've been raped? In your own home? While your husband (Daddy) was only gone for 15 minutes?
At first I couldn't tell him. I could not make the words come out of my mouth. EVENTUALLY later that day (after Dillhole had left) I told Daddy that I felt Dillhole had taken advantage of me.
The more we talked about it that evening and the more I told Daddy about it, with his asking questions of course, the closer we got to that ugly four letter "R" word.
Finally while we were talking Daddy looked at me and said "So he raped you?" and all I could do was nod my head and cry.
*IF* I had not been able to talk so openly with Daddy..what might have happened to our relationship? A secret that huge can and has ruined marriages.
Telling about events such as these has a way of making people come together as well. From standing up and speaking about my experience with Dillhole I've made some new friends, and I've repaired some old friendships as well.
So dealing with the aftermath of a Dillhole is a daily occurrence right now. He was very good at planting little seeds in dark corners of your brain, and giving them *just* enough sunlight to get them started growing, then just like the leaves on the trees in spring, suddenly, seemingly as if over night **POP** there's all the leaves..or the sprouted seeds he planted WEEKS ago.
There have been lots of tears, which I hate to admit because I'm sure he'd take some sort of sick pleasure in knowing he has actually upset us. There has been LOTS of talking, MORE than usual, which has always been a lot. There has also been a lot of bond strengthening.
All in all, at this point, Dillhole is going through a lot and is trying to bring a lot of people down with him.
I am standing up right here, right now, to say that I WILL NOT GO DOWN IN FLAMES BECAUSE OF A DILLHOLE!
I have NOTHING to hide, ALL my cards are on the table.
I must say this reminds me of a quote..hold on and let me see if I can get that for you guys in some kind of pretty picture..*Plays Jeopardy final question music* (I mean, you don't really have to wait..I already found the picture and just uploaded right under here for your convenience!)
~*~ Kat ~*~